Solstice
by silver replies
Summary: It is silly of you to think this is a love story - it is a tragedy at best. sasusaku


"Naruto," she says sternly, as if she is about to lecture him. She gives him a meaningful look, the firm line of her mouth eventually easing into a smile as she flickers her gaze to her raven-haired friend. "Now tell me, have you met Hinata?"

There is silence in the tent as he tries to process what Sakura had just asked him and then he looks at Hinata and he sees her on the day of Pain's invasion and if he had known then, he knows and understands now more than ever. Sakura is waiting, examining the situation, calculating. The pregnant silence is broken, of course, by Naruto.

"Nice to meet you," he says, smiling brightly at her, and she glows in the wake of his full attention. "It's my pleasure, Hinata… Hinata-chan."

Sakura stands up, brushing nonexistent crumbs from her lap. She catches Sasuke by the wrist, gently pulling him in the direction of the exit. "Don't touch me," he snarls, struggling against her grip. She persists, pulls harder – and that is the way it has always been between them.

"Come now, Sasuke-kun, won't you join me for the longest night of the year?" she says sweetly, something at the corner of her mouth teasing him, mocking him. He remains silent, only cursing the chakra seals Tsunade had put on him and Sakura's acquisition of superhuman strength. Leaf, he thinks when he thinks of the Hokage. He hates the Leaf, he says. Sakura is Leaf. "My parents met on this day, you know. My mother always told me that on the longest night of the year, one should light a candle to guide their loved ones beyond the grave to the right place."

He stares at her blankly, eyes boring into hers. _And you now tell me that you know what loss is?_

"But," she says, this time quietly, "I don't think that candles are just for spirits – I mean, candles guide other people to the right places, too. They illuminate the darkness, you know. For both the living and non-living." She pauses to lick her chapped lips, bringing moisture to them. He only then notices that his hand in hers, fingers entwined. His wrist twitches, his whole body shifts away from her, but she does not waver. "My mother would light a candle every year for my father; before she met him, when they were together, and after he had left. She was not a kunoichi, but she was a strong woman and it was her love and dedication to my father that made her so."

"You were never supposed to be one either, Sakura," he finds himself saying. He wants to grimace in the aftermath of his insult, to catch himself and maybe apologize. But Sakura is Sakura, and Sakura is still Leaf and he will take his victories, however miniscule and immature, wherever he can get them.

Her unwavering patience both angers and concerns him. She starts again, bringing her eyes to meet his in confidence. "I also light a candle every year, Sasuke-kun," Sakura practically sings, a secret smile working its way onto her face. "Before, after, and well… now; in the future, too, even if you decide to come back to us." He snorts at this, at the irony of the situation – if he decides, as if he has a choice.

Sasuke is surprised by the quick, sudden impact of Sakura's chakra in his system, working its way through his veins, through his blood. It intermingles with his, unraveling it and loosening it.

"Don't tell anyone, ne, Sasuke-kun? It can be our little secret." She makes an O with her lips and presses her pointer finger to them for emphasis. "Naruto wouldn't understand – and for a while, I didn't understand either. We're not twelve anymore, Sasuke-kun; we can all make decisions for ourselves. Forcing you to stay here with me – with us isn't going to do anyone good, is it?" Sakura laughs at this humorlessly and he examines the slight tremor in her speech. Her head bows.

I love you so much that it hurts, she says.

Please, just stay with me, she says.

He thanks her before leaving.

And if he had known then, he knows and understands now more than ever.

Destroy Leaf.

They were far enough from the camp now, far enough for him to run off into the wilderness where nobody would be able to find him. "Sakura," he says after a while, and she shifts her gaze from the ground of the forest to the man standing in front of her.

_don'tsaythankyoudon'tsaythankyouplease—_

"Where does this leave us?" he asks coolly, his long bangs covering his eyes. Just like that night, she remarks.

"Just where we've always been, Sasuke-kun; nowhere." She bites down hard on her bottom lip, drawing blood. A wind rustles in the background and suddenly, he is behind her. "You can never say goodbye to me to my face, huh, Sasuke-kun?" she croaks. Sakura acknowledges the heat radiating off of the body behind her, but finds herself more focused on the loss of warmth in her right hand. "I love you, Sasuke-kun," she says hesitantly, as if only an afterthought.

"You can keep your candles, Sakura," he whispers behind her. She can hear the smirk in his voice. She feels like screaming at him, punching him, beating him into the ground – anything to make him stay but she knows that she can't, and that she couldn't even with the chakra seals in place.

"There's no bench to leave me on this time, you know," she cautions him, torn between melancholy and amusement. She hears Sasuke mutter something behind her, something empty and vague. She knows without truly knowing that it is half-truth that she doesn't care much to hear. She sighs as she feels slight pressure to the back of her neck, her last thought hazily trying to remember his face when he had first met her.

He delivers her to the boundaries of the camp and closes her finger around a small candle that he had fought in her pouch. He knows that she did not listen to his last words to her, to his last promise.

_Wait for me, he said._

She did not have to listen because even though she was Leaf, she was Sakura – and Sakura would always wait for him.

_It is silly of you to think this is a love story – it is a tragedy, at best._


End file.
